Monday, December 16, 2013

Holiday Season Post

Owners/Founders of JLB Creatives
Don & Janet Beasley
Shouting out a resounding hello and welcome to our JLB Creatives fans both established and new. It is with great pleasure we extend our warmest and sincerest Christmas wishes to you. 

We also want to take this time to thank all of you for your shared enthusiasm and continued support of JLB Creatives. Without you, there would be no reason to continue our endeavors of bringing light to the literary world.

During this holiday season we ask even more so that you take the time to remember those who are struggling in ways many of us cannot even imagine; say a prayer, pay a visit, lend a helping hand, deliver a hug, tell someone you love them. For so many families, 2013 served as an extremely difficult year. Homes were lost, jobs were lost, family members passed away unexpectedly, terminal illnesses set in, and the hardship list goes on. Who knows, you may just be the light and hope someone needs to get through not only their day, but the holiday season. 

Christmas is a time when we here at JLBC celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. If you've not heard/read the real Christmas story we invite you to enjoy the following. May it bring peace, love, and hope to you and your family. 

The Christmas Story

Matthew 1:18-25
18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: After His mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Spirit. 19 Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put her away secretly. 20 But while he thought about these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take to you Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. 21 And she will bring forth a Son, and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins.”
22 So all this was done that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the Lord through the prophet, saying: 23 “Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel,” which is translated, “God with us.”
24 Then Joseph, being aroused from sleep, did as the angel of the Lord commanded him and took to him his wife, 25 and did not know her till she had brought forth her firstborn Son. And he called His name Jesus.

Luke 2:1-20

In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world.  And everyone went to their own town to register.
So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.
And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night.An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. 10 But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah,the Lord. 12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”
13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
               14   “Glory to God in the highest heaven,
    and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”
15 When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”
16 So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger.17 When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18 and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. 19 But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. 20 The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!

This post will remain live on the blog until the New Year arrives. At that time we will return with exciting news for 2014, along with our featured authors and much more. 

Stay safe and enjoy the season.

Janet & Don Beasley

Monday, December 9, 2013

Meet Author Mishael Witty

Hello faithful readers. We're so glad to have you here. If you're looking for something fun to give your reading friends this season why not add a link to the JLB Creatives Blog so they too can become a fan like you and keep up with all of the latest JLBC has to offer?

Get ready for December 13-15
The Virtual Ebook Fair has something 
very special planned!

Mark your calendars - and take advantage of this festive online event to fill those Kindles before you give them! 

Here's a nugget from the upcoming fair  - 
The Hidden Earth Series Volume 1 Maycly the Trilogy will have all 3 books for FREE all 3 days! Volume 2 will only be 99 cents! Turn your literary lovers into Hidden Earth Series fans at the Virtual Ebook Fair this coming weekend!

~     ~     ~

And be sure to read our feature this week here on the JLB Creatives Blog.

This week we are featuring a cover debut by author Mishael Witty.

~     ~     ~

Take it away Mishael. . .

In the late ‘70s/early-‘80s, Kenny Rogers had a major hit with the song “The Gambler”. I remember that song well, even though I was very young when it first came out. The lines to the chorus are running through my head right now as I type this: “You’ve got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, and know when to run…”

The cover for BELIEVE IN ME was the first one that I ever tried to create for myself. It was good, I thought. Other people said it was nice… But when I compared it to the covers of the bestsellers out there, there was something that was missing. I finally put my finger on what it was – the professional edge.
I’d taken a gamble in developing my own cover, and after a year or so, it became clear that BELIEVE IN ME needed a professional face lift; that is, this became clearer to me once I started working with professional artist Barbara Ivie Green on a cover for another one of my books (my upcoming historical novel, THE FADING SUN).

It was instant, love at first sight. Barbara took my story ideas, and she made my characters come to life right before my eyes. I was amazed and so excited. I couldn’t wait to share this amazing cover with the rest of the world. So, without further ado, here it is.

 is a sweet romance/Christmas novella 
that is currently available on Amazon in both 
paperback and ebook form.

Mishael Austin Witty is a professional editor and the internationally bestselling author of SHADOWS OF THINGS TO COME, a Christian thriller/suspense novel, and BELIEVE IN ME, a sweet contemporary romance/women’s fiction novella. In addition to these books, she has newly released a zombie fairy tale, CAMPANULA, which marks a departure from the usual for her, but it was great fun to write, and she already has plans for another.
She lives in Louisville, KY (where most of the action of CAMPANULA takes place), with her husband, two cats, and two daughters.

Connect with her online in the following places:

Other books by Mishael Witty:

Monday, December 2, 2013

Meet Author A.R. Silverberry

Welcome fans! We certainly want to wish you a fantastic week ahead, and hope that the holiday season for you is special in your favorite way.

This week we are featuring author Peter Adler. Peter has chosen to hook us up with an Excerpt Extravaganza! So grab a mug of hot chocolate, sit back, relax, and enjoy this week's post.

Author A.R. Silverberry

Wyndano's Cloak

Jen has settled into a peaceful life when a terrifying event awakens old fears—of being homeless and alone, of a danger horrible enough to destroy her family and shatter her world forever.

She is certain that Naryfel, a shadowy figure from her past, has returned and is concentrating the full force of her hate on Jen's family. But how will she strike? A knife in the dark? An attack from her legions? Or with the dark arts and twisted creatures she commands with sinister cunning.

Wyndano's Cloak may be Jen's only hope. If she’s got what it takes to use it . . .

Alert, Jen backed away from the tree and studied it at a crouch. The air was still. The grass motionless. But the leaves stirred and fluttered. Words floated down. At first they were indistinct, as if someone called through a distant snowstorm. One word emerged clearly, and an icy finger traced down her spine.
She heard her name.
She backed away until she squatted on some rocks that extended into the pool. Every muscle—sun-hammered and wind-hardened like metal in a forge—was poised to spring. Phrases whispered down. The only sense she could make was that something was coming. Something dangerous.
She thought of her family. Fear tightened around her heart. She was a hair's-breadth away from running to them. Her feet stayed rooted to the spot. Maybe she'd hear more.
A small splash made her look at the pond. Two more followed, as if someone had thrown pebbles. Nothing had fallen into the water. But ripples spread out and ran into each other. More splashes erupted like tiny volcanoes, until the whole pool was agitated with colliding rings. A circle of calm emerged below Jen's feet, pushing the waves back. Pale and ghostly, a face rose from the muddy bottom of the pool until it floated just below the surface.

A. R. Silverberry’s Website


Until next week. . .stay casual, live life to the fullest, and have a piece of chocolate for me

Your blog host,

Author Janet Beasley

Monday, November 25, 2013

Meet 81 year old Jewelry Crafter Chuck Young

Hello fans and welcome to the JLB Creatives Blog. Are you ever in for a treat this week! And what a terrific week to feature this artist. We're coming into Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Super Saturday, Stellar Sunday, and Cyber Monday, and this crafter is ready to face the masses. . .online, plus you'll find his amazing work at select local central Florida businesses. 

But first we'd like you to take a look at these phenomenal books brought to you by 
JLB Creatives Publications.
All of these make great gifts! Fill those Kindles with ebooks before you give them as gifts. Purchase paperbacks for those who love to hold the real pages in their hands. 

Whatever your gift giving style be sure to shop directly from our dedicated links at And be sure to share the link with your friends this holiday season for great deals and books suitable for the entire family!

And now. . .on with the show!

We are proud to introduce to you an 81 year old jewelry crafter, Chuck Young, who has teamed together with his daughter, author and JLB Creatives Blog Host, Janet Beasley, and all for a good cause.

Here is their story. . .


Marilyn and Charles Young 2009
When Chuck and his wife Marilyn got the diagnosis of Alzheimer's for Marilyn, like any family facing this journey, they were devastated. 

They knew things would be changing as time moved on; there was no escaping the harsh, cruel, truth.

They began to make adjustments as needed, and there were so many adjustments to be made.

This is their story. . .

They met in high school and were married in 1950. They shared a life together with family and friends that made Normal Rockwell paintings come to life.

Chuck worked in aviation for 42 years, while Marilyn excelled at raising the family, and working in the schools as an administrative genius. She was active in 4-H for several years, and offered her generosity to the local community in many ways. Their life was a dream come true as they both worked hard to provide for the family. They never had extravagant homes or cars, but they always had the best that suited their needs, and they never lacked on love for one another. They were always thrilled to hear their youngest daughter, Janet, say that they had made her life a living fairy tale.

Life had its ups and downs, but they never gave in to hardships. Chuck, Marilyn, and their daughters were conquerors in an ever changing world. Their biggest weapon being their attitude toward others as well as life itself. Life was going as they had planned and dreamed.

Long before the diagnosis, (and only a few short years since Chuck had retired) on September 11, 2001 the attacks on the World Trade Center wreaked havoc in many families who were not even directly involved. Along with the news of friends in the area narrowly escaping, Chuck and Marilyn's investments were shattered, their retirement money was gone.

But like we said, this family has never been one to give up, or throw in the towel. The family talked about it and decided they had enough to make a go of it for a few years, all hoping that Janet and her husband's company would grow during those few years and they would all live happily ever after. But as we know, life doesn't always send out the memos you wish you had before things happen.

Preparing for the first of four hurricanes
2004 came and Chuck and Marilyn, along with Janet and her husband, found themselves in the midst of four hurricanes. Long story short, the hurricanes brought devastation to the family business. Something had to be done. Janet's husband was blessed to find a job. Hoping for the best once again this family was able to make ends meet, and live a life that brought stability to the four of them.

Boarded up and ready to endure. .  .
Janet's health began to dwindle, and the stacking chronic illnesses were taking their toll. She was not able to hold a job due to health restraints. That's when she decided to ramp it up on her novel writing. 
Storm Frances coming over the horizon

In 2005 identity theft reared it's ugly head on both families, forcing them all spiraling into financial ruins. Yet again, this family did not give up. 

It wasn't long before they were forced to move from their beautiful brick homes, that sat across the street from each other, and into smaller manufactured homes next door to each other. 

It was a couple of years later when Marilyn received the diagnosis of Alzheimer's. Janet became the sole care giver for her mother in the early stages, as Chuck had to take a job in addition to Janet's husband's job, to help make ends meet for the four of them due to rising medical costs. Chuck proudly served as a custodian for a local high-school. 

Janet continued caring for her mother alone. She would take her to lunch, go shopping on a small scale, and do other fun things they had always enjoyed together, laughing and telling stories. When Chuck got home from work each day they would have dinner together and once again laugh and tell stories, but times were changing, and not for the better.

Clean-up from Frances begins before Ivan hits
The next major adjustment came when Janet could no longer handle her mother alone during the day. Marilyn began falling due to being off balance, and worrying over and over about where Chuck was. She was not grasping the fact any longer that he was working to make ends meet. Janet, suffering from her own stack of chronic illnesses, found she was not capable physically to care for her mother alone. Chuck had to quit his job at the high-school and become the second 24/7 care giver, along with Janet, for the love of his life.

Janet's husband stepped up to the plate and began working overtime whenever he could, and still does to this day. The medical costs became overwhelming for Marilyn's care, especially when the Medicare doughnut hole hits for Marilyn every year in late July!

An X-ray of Marilyn's
actual replacement elbow
June of 2012 Marilyn fell and shattered her elbow. An hour and a half surgery turned into four hours as they removed 12 pieces of bone chips, re-attached the ulnar nerve as it had been severed and the bone it was originally attached to was now gone, and put in a brand new metal elbow. (The medical field can be amazing sometimes). However, it is now November of 2013 and Marilyn does not remember falling. She does not understand why her fingers and arm hurt without ceasing. Chuck and Janet reassure her hourly, often times minutely, of the incident and that she's going to be OK - someday - they just don't know how long it will take to heal completely. Marilyn, sadly, is allergic to pain medications so she has had to endure the lengthy recovery on OTC medicines alone.

And still, to our amazement, this family fought tooth and nail to not let the world get them down: financially, spiritually, health wise, or attitude wise.

Life had thrown some hard knocks at this family, and they were determined to survive. They did. . .but not without a price. Through it all the four of them lost their "nest eggs," their homes, their health, and their summer home which they had built with their own hands and shared together since the 1970's. Between them they also lost the original family business, closed the doors on another they had started after losing the first one, were in a bad accident, blew two engines in two separate cars. One of them had a pace maker put in, one had cataracts removed, one had an ICM put in, they made 6 ER runs in 5 weeks with Marilyn, another was diagnosed with liver problems, one had cancer removed, and yet another developed bone spurs in the neck along with a pinched nerve and a sciatica, and they all are currently battling (with a group of homeowners) numerous ridiculous legal actions that have been ongoing for the past 6 years regarding the subdivision in which they live. 

We asked Janet if the stress was ever more than they could handle them. She replied, "If we'd let it, but we rarely do. Besides, God promises in His word that He will never give us more than we can handle. . .but He never said circumstances wouldn't push you to the limit!" She laughed and went on to say, "It seems like every corner we turn to try and escape this crazy reality we're stuck in, we find nothing but misery - but that's OK," says Janet. "We've all learned you're going to have problems in life. You can wake up and be happy or sad. We've chosen to be happy because either way the circumstances most likely won't change in a second, so why not enjoy life as best you can. Happiness is only a choice away." She laughed again, and finished with, "We've got each other, and that's the feature we focus on to keep going - cheering and rooting for each other all the way."

After hearing all of this we thought, with all these folks have been through certainly something good has to happen, and soon. . .right? So we pressed on to find out if it did.

In the summer of 2013, while searching for ways to bring in more income (without leaving the house as Marilyn now needs constant care) to help offset the rising medical costs, a dear friend suggested to Janet and Chuck the idea of combining their talents. And so they did.

Here's how it shakes down. Janet has written and published her first epic fairy tale adventure: Volume 1 "Maycly the Trilogy," two companions books, plus Volume 2 "Planet Land ~ The Adventures of Cub and Nash." She is currently finishing Volume 3 "Planet Water ~ Draugar of the Abyss" and looking forward to a 2014 release. In addition, Janet is a scenic nature photographer. Chuck on the other hand has always worked with his hands creating and building as a hobby, and swears he's who Janet got her fantastical imagination from. When they brought together the Hidden Earth Series, Janet's nature photography, and Chuck's amazing ability to work with polymer clay, they found a new venture to help with the extreme medical costs.

Something good really did happen! Fairy Tales and Jewelry was born! And now the proceeds from every novel and piece of jewelry that are sold go toward helping with Marilyn's medical bills.

Visit Fairy Tales & Jewelry from now thru December 31, 2013 to save big!
Spend $29.90 and get 40% your order PLUS FREE SHIPPING!
Use Coupon Code BIGDEAL40

You'll find Fairy Tales and Jewelry online at Etsy here:  or you can visit to discover more about the jewelry and the novel series Janet is writing. 

     Together this family has endured more than some, yet not nearly as much as others, and they are forever grateful to have each other to lean on when circumstances seem impossible. This family is truly an example of the cliche`, When the going gets tough, the tough get going.

     Chuck's jewelry and a selection from Janet's books are also available locally at Long & Scott's Farm Mount in Dora, Florida. You'll find the items in the quaint gift shop at the farm. . .be sure and have some lunch at the cafe`, and tell them Chuck, Marilyn, and Janet sent you. ;-)

Pictured L to R:
Ken & Dar (Chuck's oldest daughter), Chuck, Marilyn, Janet
visiting Long & Scott's Farm November, 2013
Janet has been humbled by the responses she is receiving from her novels. The Hidden Earth Series has made it's way across the nation, and into libraries and schools. Volume 1 has received stunning 5 star reviews from Reader's Favorite and on Amazon. Plus Volume 1 has made a difference in the classroom (read a snippet from an email Janet received from a 6th grade language and arts teacher by visiting the Reviews page on - it's approximately half way down the page).

Chuck and Marilyn continue to cheer and support their daughter's novel adventure. In fact, they believe in the Hidden Earth Series so much Chuck printed out a fake million dollar bill and presented it to Janet on the release date of Volume 1. As he handed it to her he said, "Here's to your first million Coop-cake!" 

Janet hopes to see her novels on the big screen, and she believes with all her heart she stands just as much a chance as the next author. And obviously by now, you are aware that Janet is not a quitter when it comes to conquering epic obstacles (and epic novels), so to her, her envisioning of Hidden Earth Series on the big screen is only an enchanted voyage away. She also dreams of having her series make the Scholastic list of books, and enjoys pondering the thought of seeing the land of Maycly make its debut in a well known theme park some day. When people ask her if she would like to be compared to Rowling or Tolkein she simply smiles and answers, "No. I'd rather they be compared to me," then she laughs and dons that wonderful smile of hers, and you can't help but become a fan. 

Visit Janet and the Hidden Earth Series on Amazon by clicking here

We encourage you to shop small businesses this holiday season, and we hope Fairy Tales and Jewelry is one of them. Small businesses are one of the many things that make this free country so great. We hope that you find this family's small business endeavors worthy of discovery and will share the news with your family and friends this holiday season when it comes to giving gifts. Because how cool is it to give a gift that benefits a cause? 

Until next week, we wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving!
The JLB Creatives Executive Team


Monday, November 18, 2013

Meet Author Connie Smith

Hello and welcome to the JLB Creatives Blog. Here's where you'll find authors and artists who are worthy of discovery!

And in case you missed it last week - be sure to take a look at JLB Creatives latest publications that are hot off the press!

Available in both paperback and ebook these books make great gifts! Kids, teachers, and parents are scarfing up Ask DG, author Mark Miller, as it's perfect for the classroom or home school. Those looking for hope are finding that A Life Renewed, by Lisa Andrews, is quite the real-life story of a cancer survivor. And if you're looking for an escape to a fun fantasy world for your kids, pick up a copy of Tinfoil Girl by our 10 year old author, Olivia Miller.

It takes a strong will to become an artist and survive. Dedication, passion for the craft, and a great attitude are what bring artists' work to the light. JLB Creatives is dedicated and passionate regarding bringing the literary world to light along with other artists. So stop by weekly here at the blog to discover a multitude of creative geniuses who make life worth living!
This week we are featuring Connie Smith. We're certain you'll fall in love with her and her work the way we did. So without any further ado, we proudly introduce to you...

Author Connie Smith

Connie has chosen to bring you a JLB Creatives exclusive feature:
An Author Splash.

Click here to see it on Amazon
My name is Connie L. Smith, and I’m a new author working my way through my first trilogy. You can find the link to buy Essenced, the first book, (only $1.99 when not on sale) on my website.

I have a very distinct obsession with the 1950s. And Christmas. I decorate like crazy.

I read way too much for my own good, and would seriously consider starting a book review site if I didn’t already have so many places to invest my time. I love a good fantasy story, and YA has wedged its way into my heart.

Supernatural is my current TV obsession, and my music collection just wouldn’t be complete these days without a big dose of Hinder. Their bassist is actually my soul mate. He just doesn’t necessarily know it.

I studied History in college (Northern Kentucky University), so my semesters included too much research about dead people.

I have a few old lady hobbies. I love to bake and make junk food, especially around the holiday season, and I’ve done a bit of sewing in my time as well. I’m also not-so-terrible at floral arrangements.

This may sound like an impressive list of abilities, but you have to balance it out with the fact that I stink at driving and can’t swim. It’s a give and take situation.

I’m terrified of bees. Seriously. I’m not even really allergic, but I’ll dance and dodge to avoid them.

For years, I’ve been disappointed in myself for being in the theater for Return of the King, hearing Aragorn ask, “What say you?” and not yelling, “Ni.” Alas. Some regrets we can do nothing about.

Fairies make me happy. In fact, a fairly big portion of me will always be sad that I don’t have wings. And that I can’t swing dance. And that I can’t own a winged horse.

I love photography, but I’m not that amazing at it from an artistic standpoint.

I grew up in the country, and it shows. Sometimes all the twang in my accent combines into a centralized force and shoves it way into conversation. I still like some of the simpler aspects of that kind of life – sitting on a front porch swing or staring at a mountain stream. There’s something tranquil about those smaller things, and I wouldn’t trade my memories revolving around them for a more city-based childhood.


There you have it - Connie Smith, a down to earth super kind of person, don't you think?
Be sure to check out her latest book - better yet, buy one - and leave her a comment. She'd love to hear from her fans here on the JLB Creatives Blog.

Until we meet again. . .stay casual, live life to the fullest, and have a piece of chocolate for me ;-)

Your blog host

Author Janet Beasley

Monday, November 11, 2013

Meet Author E.P. Rose

Welcome one and all to this week's blog post. This week's feature is author E.P. Rose. We're certain you'll find the interview entertaining and interesting. 

But before we get started, we wanted to let you know about some new books that are hot off the press, published by JLB Creatives. Check out the carousel below to visit and discover these cool new paperbacks and ebooks.

And now, we present to you, our interview with

E.P. Rose

Let’s say you’re thinking about going on a once in a life time vacation…how exciting! What are some of the places you’d consider, and what would you do while you’re there?

I find the thought of a once in a lifetime vacation, whatever the destination may be, incredibly depressing. And then what, when this once in a lifetime vacation is over? Is that it? All subsequent vacations will by definition disappoint, failing to measure up to this once in a lifetime one. I think the aim should be that one’s whole life is a once in a lifetime vacation. “What about work?” I hear you say. Well, yes, there is that. Mind you, I have been on more than one vacation that was much harder work than work. But the point I’m making is that life is an extraordinary adventure, and we should at least try to treat the whole thing as such, however hard that might be. It happens in your head. That’s the ultimate vacation destination – inside your own head.

A zealous fan approaches your book signing table and wants to know everything there is to know about writing a book…right now! There’s a long line of fans waiting, and you only have a few seconds…what one thing would tell them to encourage them to become a writer?

Thinking about writing is not writing. Wanting to be a writer is not writing. Reading other people’s writing is not writing. Only writing is writing. And if you write just five pages a week, which is less than a page a day, at the end of the year, you’ll have 260 pages – and there’s your first book. So, go home and get on with it. You’re keeping people waiting.

What book or books are you currently working on? Can we expect a new release soon?

I am currently working on a book inspired by a couple of years I spent  with Lionel Bart, writing his biography, which never quite happened, so we wrote a musical instead, but that never quite happened either, and then we became estranged, and then he died. It also involves a Mexican drug lord, not entirely dissimilar to one who lived along a Mexican beach, where I once spent some time. These two stories, the biography and the drug lord, combine and intertwine, and are turning into a novel entitled “Mee and I”, which should be finished some time next year. Possibly.

Time for dinner! No, no, no, we’re not cooking – we’re going out. So…where’s your favorite place to throw down some good food with friends and family? And even more so, what do you recommend from the menu?

Oh my goodness, I wish you hadn’t mentioned food. I am absolutely starving. My wife has two fantastic restaurants in London. How about this? Let’s have a martini and the first course in New York at the wonderful Union Square Café, where I absolutely love the Fried Calamari, with spicy anchovy mayonnaise. Then we can teleport to Kensington and Rebecca’s Michelin-starred Kitchen W8, where – I don’t know, it’s all pretty good – but, OK, I’m going to have the Caramelized Fillet and Raviolo of Pata Negra Pork. And for dessert? Let’s get the plane out and fly to Vienna for strudel. The Café Landtmann would be nice, where you can hobnob with the ghosts of Freud and Mahler and Marlene Dietrich.

What kind of animals, birds, or fish do you like best? Do you have any pets - how many do you have – and what are their names?

I have one labradoodle called Frank – and a cat called Wednesday. I have always had something of a soft spot for the Tasmanian devil.

Time for adventure! Your friends are heading out to go skydiving for the first time…are you going to join them or suggest a different adventure? If you go skydiving please elaborate, or if you suggest something else what would your favorite adventure be?

I personally know two people who died in skydiving accidents. I don’t know, it’s probably statistically a lot less dangerous than driving in a car, but I don’t think I could stop myself from trying to persuade any friend of mine from jumping out of a plane for fun. People do like adrenalin rushes though, don’t they? I’m not sure if I do. I took Frank for a walk earlier this morning, and the leaves have started to fall, and when I shuffled through them, my spirits soared – but that’s not really the same as leaping off the side of a mountain, or plunging into a pothole, which is my idea of a nightmare.

When I was a kid, I was infatuated with a book called Under the Red Sea by Hans and Lotte Hass and was desperate to be a scuba diver. Nowadays, just the thought of the mask makes me hyperventilate, and I get ear-ache under a depth of six feet. Personally, I consider writing to be an extreme sport – and the rare rush I get, when I’m on location in my head and the speed of physical writing is in synch with the story and it’s downhill ducking and diving and dancing all the way – well, you can’t beat it.

Forget about make-believe super powers…we’ll never have them – bummer, I know right? But good news…TRUE super powers come in different forms such as a great attitude, a wonderful personality, loving kindness, and other cool traits like those. Who’s the one super hero in your life, and what is their TRUE super power?

I’m going for Gandhi – fiercely intelligent, wonderfully eccentric, very funny, optimistic, loving, but above all: morally courageous. Do read his autobiography “The Story of My Experiments with Truth” and Louis Fischer’s excellent “Life of Mahatma Gandhi”. Here’s a couple of great Gandhi quotes to be getting on with: “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” And  “There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.” Oh, and this is a good one: “What do I think of Western Civilization? I think it would be a very good idea.”

Do you prefer writing the good guy’s dialogue or the villain’s? Give us an example of your amazing talent…write us a line of dialogue from your favorite good guy or villain.

Baddy: “Hey. You. Shut up. I’m doing the dialogue here.”
Goody: “Technically speaking, it’s not dialogue, if you don’t let anyone else say anything.”
Baddy: “See this gun? This gun I’m pointing at your stupid mouthy head? With this gun I can put the die in dialogue any time I choose.”

Soup or stew?


Chocolate or vanilla?


Dogs or cats?

Dogs, but don’t tell Wednesday. She’d be upset.

Horses or cows?

I like ice-cream. Horses do not contribute to ice-cream.

Insects or reptiles?

Where would be without bees? In a wasteland.
Where would we be without snakes? Back in the Garden of  Eden.

The family wants to go camping. Are you going to join them or stay behind? If you stay behind what are you going to do? Are you going to go shopping and to the spa? Read a book? Sleep in a hammock? Please tell us…we’re curious and want to know just what you’re thinking about doing.

This is my position on camping. Jews don’t camp. We did our 40 years in the desert and that’s quite enough thank you very much. If you want to go camping, count me out. What will I be doing while you’re camping? I’ll be doing what I normally do, when you’re not camping. I’ll get up. I’ll have coffee. I’ll walk Frank. I’ll do some work. I’ll go for a swim. Have some lunch. Talk to my friends. And worry about all the awful things that could happen to you while you’re out there in the wilderness with only a thin layer of canvas between you and the predators and the perverts and the ghouls and the tornados and the ….. oh for goodness sake, why did you have to go camping? You’re ruining my day.

We all love stories – especially yours! Would you be willing to give the readers a synopsis of your current book?

Click here to check it out on Amazon
Well, of course. I can’t believe it’s taken you so long to get round to asking me. My current book is called The Conspiracy Kid. It’s in three parts: Fan Club, Hamburger and String.

Part 1. Fan Club. The Conspiracy Kid first appears in an Edwin Mars sonnet. If you read this sonnet you are automatically and irreversibly enrolled in The Conspiracy Kid Fan Club, whether you like it or not. And that’s what the book kicks off with, this sonnet, and it then goes on to tell the story of the earliest Conspiracy Kid Fan Club members. Whether this Fan Club is a new religion, a gimmick, a con, sheer nonsense or simple MacGuffin depends on who you are: Joe Claude, bereaved billionaire - Ewan Hoozarmi, artist – Muriel Cohen, chef - Walter Cornelius, werewolf …… Well, he’s not actually a werewolf, because, as we all know, werewolves don’t exist and this is not the twilight zone, but Walter thinks he’s a werewolf, which amounts to much the same thing – and goodness me, does he ever have reasonable cause? I think you’ll find that he does.

Part 2. Hamburger. Many of the characters in this story cross and come together in and about the opening of Red, White and Blues in Hammersmith, where Muriel Cohen cooks the best fictional hamburger you’ll never eat. I have spent a lot of my time in restaurants, opened a fair few over the years,  and I have to say , if people enjoy reading about Red, White and Blues as much as I enjoyed writing about it, then …….. what? Well, it’s very kind of you to say so.

And part 3, String – as in string-pulling, string theory and bog standard cotton two-ply string, miles and miles and miles of the stuff.
And that’s it - The Conspiracy Kid . It’s about the Fan Club. It’s about hamburgers and string. It’s about golf and grief. It’s about loss and laughter and love. You don’t have to be kiddish, but it helps. That’s the message.

Creativity. Where does yours come from? This is something writers are asked about much of the time.  Would you be so kind as to elaborate on where you get your ideas and what sparks your creativity?

Not sure. Boredom? In the sense that I reach of pitch of boredom that is so intense, I have to do something about it – and writing works for me. Having said that, I find that writing itself is a creative process. Writing generates ideas. And curiosity. A man walks into a bar. Oh yes? Who is he? What’s he doing there? What’s he about to do? Why should I be in the slightest bit interested? Well, because - you’re not going to believe this, but, see that woman with the leopard skin suitcase, sitting on the other side of the room ……..

Love and romance, paranormal, epic fantasy, sci-fi, mystery, thriller, drama, and the list goes on. Where do your books fall as far as genre and reading audience?

Funny grown-up literary fiction.

What are your favorite genres of books to read, and what are your favorite genres of books to write?

I read all sorts of books from Damon Runyon to Dostoyevsky, from Raymond Chandler to P.G.Wodehouse (both of whom, curiously, attended the same London school: Dulwich College), from Agatha Christie to Gustave Flaubert. And I like to write funny literary fiction for adults – as opposed, that is, to adult fiction. I mean, we’re not talking erotica here. Well, I would like to think that there is the odd not totally unerotic moment – but generally speaking the object of the exercise is to stimulate less tangible organs than those at which the erotic fiction writer tends to aim his or her quill.

Time to go to the movies! Out of all the ones you’ve seen, what’s your fav? And be sure to tell us why in case we haven’t seen it and would like to check it out.

Oh my God, how can I possibly choose ONE film? Ok, let’s do it like those things you get on Facebook, where you get a grid and you have to say which is the first word you see. (I, for some reason, always seem to see the word FUN.) I’m going to shut my eyes and the first film that comes into my mind is ………….. To Be Or Not To Be. Not the Mel Brookes remake, but the original 1942 Ernst Lubitsch version starring Jack Benny and Carole Lombard. It’s set in occupied Warsaw, where a troupe of actors use their questionable thespian powers to fool the Nazis.
It’s brilliant.

Social media has become a part of being an author. What are your 3 best tips of the trade for upcoming authors when it comes to building their social media platform?

1.      Be disciplined. Tweeting is not writing.
2.      Be disciplined. Facebook is not writing.
3.      Be disciplined. Pinning is not writing.

For the first time in your writing career someone recognizes you as their favorite author, in public. Would you panic? Smile and bask in the moment? Blush and walk away? Invite them for coffee and cupcakes? Scream? Run? Faint?

First of all, you have to make sure that the  party in question has not recently escaped from a lunatic asylum.
Do not invite the party in question for coffee and cupcakes.
If the party in question invites you for coffee and cupcakes, say thank you, but unfortunately you are on your way to a meeting with Harvey Weinstein and you’re already late. Then move swiftly away.
If this encounter occurs in the lobby of a salubrious hotel, say at the Carlyle, and your interlocutor invites you for a Gibson or two in Bemelman’s bar, well, that’s a different story…….

How do you deal with rejection when you submit an MS?

I sulk. I fume. I rage. I plot and plan revenge. For a day or two. Then I remember what Gandhi said: “First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.” So I pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again.

As an author we all know we get those “stink-o” reviews that come through now and again. How do you handle a bad review when it hits?
Sulk. Fume. Rage. Revenge.
Gandhi: “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.”
Everyone’s entitled to his own opinion.

If you could cure something in this world, what would it be?

Salmon. I’m very fond of cured salmon.

What are your pet peeves – you know those little things that just drive you nuts?

Some parts of the river round here, Frank jumps in and he comes out wet. Other parts he jumps in and comes out coated in stinky mud – which is a total pain. That’s the principal peeve I have about my pet.

What is your favorite cake? Are you an icing freak?

I don’t like icing. You can have my icing. Does strudel count as cake?

Do you create and design your own book covers?

I did, but then I was persuaded not to, and I think that was a good call. I think the more people you can get involved in the process, the better. And I was spending hours doing something that takes a professional five minutes. And Lisa Kew’s designs for both Beyond the Valley of Sex and Shopping and for The Conspiracy Kid are terrific.

As a self-published author do you recommend having your novels professionally edited? Please give us some cool thoughts of why you chose the answer you did.

A professional editor is a very good idea. You really don’t know what you’ve written until someone else has read it. Apart from the fact that it is both fun and rewarding to argue the toss with someone who knows their onions, the editorial process is essential. A good editor will inspire you to give more of what works, to remove what doesn’t and, well, you have to be lucky though. It’s a tricky relationship, both collaborative and confrontational. It doesn’t always work.

To ebook or not to ebook – that is the question. What’s your take?

Ebooks are not going to go away. They represent a significant percentage of all books now. They are the way many many people like to read these days. Me? I read both, but as far as what I write, I honestly don’t care what it’s read upon, as long as it’s read – kindle, nook, paperback, hardback, scroll, papyrus, t-shirt, serialized on a cereal box – it doesn’t really matter.

Where can we find your book(s)?

Amazon US   Amazon UK

The book can also be ordered through any bookshop / ebook outlet.
Or you can buy a signed copy direct from the publisher:  

FIND E.P.ROSE at these links:


TWITTER HANDLE: @tweeteprose


Thanks so much for stopping by. We certainly hope you enjoyed the interview.
Stop by next week to meet author Connie Smith.

Until then...stay casual, live life to the fullest, and have a piece of chocolate for me!

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